PTSD in Adults, Teens and Children
Like the name suggests, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder arises after a traumatic event – think a major car accident, being witness to a serious crime, or being a victim yourself of physical assault. Others develop PTSD after being involved in war, or rescue missions, such as that which occurred after the tsunami in 2004. Paramedics, nurses and doctors often develop PTSD after witnessing first hand the effect of violence.
Whatever the traumatic event, living with PTSD can feel like wading through a flood: you keep moving, but life never quite returns to the ease and safety it once had. Everyday tasks get done, but underneath there is a constant hum of fear, exhaustion, or numbness that does not switch off. Many adults, teens and children arrive in therapy years after the event, wondering why they “still haven’t gotten over it”, blaming themselves for not being able to just move on.
In the therapy room, a few themes appear again and again: terror, shame, and a nervous system that is stuck on high alert. People describe feeling jumpy, easily startled, irritable, or detached, often with no idea that these are classic trauma responses rather than personality flaws. They may have intrusive images, nightmares, or body sensations that seem to come out of nowhere, or find themselves avoiding places, conversations, or people that remind them – even vaguely – of what happened.
If any of this sounds familiar, you are not “crazy” or weak. Your mind and body have been trying very hard to protect you.
What Does PTSD Look Like In Adults?
Adults with PTSD often present as highly responsible, high‑achieving, or endlessly “busy”, yet internally feel on the brink of collapse. Some report being unable to relax even on holiday, feeling constantly on guard, scanning for danger in crowds, on public transport, or even at home with loved ones. Others swing between numbness and sudden waves of panic, rage, or grief that seem out of proportion to what is happening in the moment.
Common experiences include:
- Intrusive memories or nightmares about the trauma, or sudden flashbacks where it feels as if it is happening again
- Avoidance of reminders: certain routes home, hospitals, uniforms, news stories, smells, or even particular times of day
- Physical symptoms: trouble sleeping, headaches, stomach issues, chronic pain, or a racing heart with no apparent medical cause
- Emotional changes: feeling detached from others, losing interest in previously enjoyable activities, or believing “I am broken” or “The world is never safe”
Many adults only come to therapy when something in life forces a pause – a relationship crisis, burnout, parenting struggles, or a physical health scare. Often, within a few sessions, it becomes clear how much unprocessed trauma is driving the current difficulties.
PTSD In Teens And Children
Teens and children rarely walk into a room saying “I think I have PTSD”. Instead, their distress shows up in different clothes. A teenager might become withdrawn, irritable, or suddenly reckless. A child might seem clingy, aggressive, or “spacey” and distracted. Teachers may notice a drop in grades or behaviour changes long before anyone talks about trauma.
For younger people, PTSD can look like:
- Nightmares or sleep problems, sometimes with no clear memory of the nightmare content
- Re‑enacting aspects of the trauma in play, drawings, or stories
- Sudden fears of places or people that previously felt safe
- Big swings in mood or behaviour – explosive anger, shutting down, or “zoning out”
Children and teens are also more likely to believe that what happened was their fault, or that they should have somehow prevented it. Without supportive adults helping them make sense of events, they can silently carry self‑blame for years.
If a child or teenager shares a frightening experience, the most powerful response is to listen, believe them, and tell them clearly: “You did nothing wrong.”
Is it Ever Too Late To Heal From PTSD?
Many people assume that therapy helps only if they go immediately after the trauma. In practice, the opposite is often true: survivors often only feel safe enough to speak after some time has passed.
Sometimes it becomes easier to get help when life becomes more stable, or in the case of parental abuse, when we are no longer dependent on the people who hurt us
Before therapy, many clients cope by shutting down memories and emotions. Dissociation is common, and this is a feeling of being numb, blocked off, or feeling as if you watching life from the outside. Dissociation is the mind’s way of trying to protect itself when the full impact of the trauma feels unbearable. Over time, however, suppressed memories leak through as anxiety, depression, panic, or chronic relationship difficulties.
In trauma‑focused therapy, it is entirely possible to see meaningful shifts even decades after the event. After starting therapy, clients report sleeping through the night after years of disrupted sleep. Others report being able to stay present with themselves and others. Self-compassion does not arrive overnight, but slowly in therapy , as years of misplaced self-blame are gently examined. We know healing has occured when they are finally able to say with conviction, “What happened to me was not my fault.”
What does PTSD therapy involve?
Therapy for PTSD is not about forcing you to relive your worst moments all at once. It is about building enough safety and stability that your story can be told, felt, and re‑understood in a way that no longer shatters you each time you think about it.
In the therapy room, the work usually unfolds in phases:
Building safety and understanding
he first task is to create a relationship where you feel safe enough to show up as you are, without having to minimise or perform. Together, we map how trauma has affected your mind, body, and relationships. Learning that your symptoms are normal trauma responses – not personal failures – is often a huge relief.
Reclaiming life, on your terms
A later phase of therapy involves reconnecting with parts of yourself that trauma pushed aside: creativity, playfulness, sexuality, spirituality, or ambition. You experiment with new ways of being – saying no, choosing safer relationships, pursuing long‑delayed goals – and learn that it is possible to build a life that is not organised entirely around fear.
Stabilising the nervous system
Before touching the most painful memories, we practise grounding, breathing, and body‑based techniques so you have ways to calm overwhelming emotions. The goal is for you to feel safer in your own body, and to know you can slow things down if it gets too much.
Rebuilding relationships, boundaries, and self‑worth
As flashbacks, nightmares and constant hypervigilance ease, there is more room to look at current relationships, work, and daily life. We explore boundaries, red flags, and patterns of over‑giving or self‑abandonment that often grow out of trauma. The work here is about helping you feel worthy of respect, safety, and joy, not just survival.
Processing traumatic memories
Once there is enough safety, we begin to gently process what happened in a structured way. This might involve trauma‑focused talking therapies, somatic work, or other evidence‑based methods. The aim is not to erase the memory, but to file it in the past, so it no longer ambushes you with the same intensity. As we work, we pay close attention to the beliefs laid down at the time – “I am powerless”, “I should have stopped it”, “I am not safe anywhere” – and carefully test them against the reality of your life now.
How Can I Support A Child Or Teen with PTSD?
For children and adolescents, the difference between merely surviving trauma and genuinely thriving often comes down to one crucial factor: the response of the adults around them. When a child is believed, protected, and helped to make sense of what happened, the trauma can become one painful chapter in an otherwise rich story. When they are dismissed, blamed, or silenced, the wound often deepens.
If a child or teen discloses a frightening or traumatic event:
- Listen more than you speak. Let them tell it in their own words, at their own pace.
- Acknowledge their hurt clearly. “What happened to you was wrong. It should never have happened.”
- Reassure them that they are not to blame. Children almost always assume they did something to cause it, even when that is clearly not true.
Caregivers do not need perfect words to be healing. They need openness, willingness to learn, and support for themselves so they do not collapse or react with denial in front of the child. Early trauma‑focused therapy with children and teens, especially when caregivers are actively involved, has strong evidence for reducing PTSD symptoms, depression, shame, and behaviour problems. Therapy typically combines developmentally appropriate tools such as play, drawing, stories, and body‑based regulation for the child or teen. It also involves coaching for caregivers on how to respond in helpful and validating ways without overwhelming the child with their own distress.
Need Help For Yourself or Someone You Care About?
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